Who and I

Once upon a time, not so long ago, if I typed here that I was a Doctor Who fan, you’d have mocked me and generally took the piss. There may well have been good grounds for this, as prior to 2005, the show was much derided, and an easy target for jokes about wobbly sets, dodgy aliens, bad acting & special effects that were anything but.

Ah but not now. Since 2005, it’s become okay to openly say “I like Doctor Who”, without people pointing at you, laughing and making you move out of the borough. Now it’s sexy. It’s fashionable. It’s hip. It’s got all the best acting talent in the UK clamouring to get onto it. It’s the biggest drama hit the BBC has had in years. It’s also the same show that was mocked years before, the same show that the BBC ran down until it became a sad parody of it’s former self, the same programme that had some of the worst miscasting ever in it’s later years. It’s the show I loved… and still love.

I grew up with Tom Baker you see. Not literally, as that would make me ancient, but with him as my Doctor. You had to have your own Doctor, in the same way you’ve got to have your James Bond or your Blue Peter presenter (Connery & Noakes, if you’re interested). Okay, Pertwee was technically my first Doctor but Tom was the man I consciously (well as much as you can at age 5) tuned in each week for.

From 1974 to 1981, as I went from infants up through juniors up to senior school, Baker travelled with me every Saturday for 26 weeks a year. People forget that the show was popular back then. It wasn’t cult TV. Families watched the show in their millions as it formed that rock upon which the BBC Saturday night TV line up was built. Football results. Basil Brush. Doctor Who. Brucie. Some drama or other. Two Ronnies. Starsky & Hutch. Match Of The Day. Parky. Bed.

Yes it could be a bit ropey but it wasn’t about the production values. It was about the story and the characters, and you believed in Baker’s Doctor, so much so you mostly overlooked the programme’s flaws as you were gripped so much by his performance.

Blackpool is almost a second home for Who, as the Exhibition was based here for so many years until it’s demise in 1985. And my parents took me to see it, as well as going one September night to see Tom, Elisabeth Sladen (ah! Sarah Jane!) and Ian Marter switch on the Illuminations in 1975, fighting off Cybermen & Daleks in their quest to pull the lever that turned on the lights. My darling Celia even met the man himself once when she was little, as he lost his way to the exhibition and asked her mum for directions. Well I say met. Hiding behind your mum’s legs counts doesn’t it?

I grew up. Honest. Peter Davison was the man who was the Doctor in my senior school years, and as I grew older, I began to take more interest in the show, it’s history, how it was made etc. Also as you get older you become more critical of the show, less blind to it’s faults. I still loved the show, and Davison is only second to Baker in my Top 10, but even at that age I could see that the show was becoming a bit insular, whereas it was previously aimed at the family audience, now the producer was progressively aiming the show at.. the Doctor Who fan. When you start playing to the gallery, you’re going to alienate the average viewer. The kids went elsewhere for their kicks.

So the show went on through the 80s, audiences dwindling as Doctors came & went, the BBC becoming less interested in making the show but loving the cash they made from selling it and the merchandise round the world, progressively killing the show but scheduling it against shows on the other channel that it could never beat it it’s current state (Daleks vs Ken & Deirdre? No contest). The Colin Baker era I could just about handle, mainly down to lusting after Nicola Bryant (hey! I was in my teens) but when Sylvester McCoy & Bonnie Langford arrived, even I couldn’t really justify watching the programme. Much.

When the show ended in 1989, there were no tears. The last series had it’s moments but too little too late. There were rumours it would be back in a couple of years, but I wasn’t the naive kid any more, I knew how the industry worked and it was obvious it was over as an ongoing TV show. There were always the videos to look back over, but looking back was all we’d have.

However, spin forward and 1996 saw the American & BBC co-funded revival of Who, starring Paul McGann, who was great even if he is a scouser. It was all very glossy and looked great if again, a bit continuity obsessed, and ratings were good in the UK. Alas, in the US it died on it’s arse and that was the end of the 8^th doctor’s ninety minute era.

I never went the full hog and became part of organised fandom. There always seemed to me to be something fundamentally.. wrong about the whole thing, you know, conventions and all that. Of course the way the show had been going in the latter part of the 80s, it was something you had to keep to yourself as it was frankly shocking, so I was quite happy not to seek out likeminded people. It was only during the dark years of the 90s that I became aware of fandom, and became sort of one of them, looking in from the outside, buying books, videos and fanzines. Fandom kept the Who brand alive in those years, with fanzine writers becoming Virgin novelists or writing for the ever popular Doctor Who magazine (27 years old this month kids!).

It was these fans that eventually worked their way up into positions of power and influence in the industry. A certain Mr Russell T Davies, who wrote a Who novel in the 90s worked many references to the show into his 1999 Channel 4 hit “Queer As Folk”. Another fan novelist, Mark Gatiss (of the League Of Gentlemen) played the Doctor in a spoof sketch also starring David Walliams who with Matt Lucas would go on to use Tom Baker’s voiceovers in Little Britain. (Why? Because he was Doctor Who of course). Steven Moffat wrote several Who short stories and shoed in many a Who joke into his Coupling series, as well as a Comic Relief sketch with the likes of Hugh Grant & Rowan Atkinson. There are many other examples… Lee & Herring, Simon Pegg and so on.

Davies was asked by the BBC what he’d like to do next. He said “Doctor Who”. They said.“okay”. And that was it. Easy as that. You’ve got one of the hottest writers in Television given carte blanche to make a new series of his favourite show as a kid. Jammy bastard.

It could have all gone wrong. He could have miscast the Doctor completely and the show would be on it’s arse again. But he asked one of the pickiest actors in the business if he’d be interested in playing the lead role in a million pound reworking of one of the oldest series on TV. Lucky he’d worked with him before or else he’d have had the door slammed in his face. Christopher Eccleston said yes. He’d never seen the show really before but would give it a go because of Russell. But who to have as a companion? Howzabout an ex-teen pop star and wannabe actress who’s always looking pissed in the tabloids with her DJ husband?

The rest seems to be history. Billie Piper has more than proved herself to be a great actress as well as a cute eye candy for Dads everywhere, Eccleston shone (all too briefly IMHO) in a role that he grabbed and made his own, the show looks great, it’s restablished itself as unmissible on Saturday nights, millions watch it, ladies love their sexy new Doctors (who'd have thought that 20 years ago?), kids love it, the toyshops are full of Daleks & Cybermen, and new Doctor David Tennant has reignited the debate we used to have back in the day… “well, I prefer Eccleston, he’s my doctor. This new one’s not as good, he's just silly and gurns too much”.

I love Doctor Who, old and new. Everything about it. The whole thing. Sarah Jane Smith. Zygons. K-9. The Brigadier. Torchwood. Even the rubbish bits, like Kamelion or Peter Kay. Even that episode with the girl with the drawings that come to life. Even Ace.

Well, maybe not Ace. Now she was embarrassing.

More Happy Monday than Blue Monday

New Order? In Blackpool? Virtually on my doorstep? It’s a no-brainer. I’m there. Especially as it’s an early birthday present from the missus. It had to be done, as it was going to be a once in a lifetime opportunity, bearing in mind the last time New Order visited the town was 24 years ago when I was still at school (30th August 1982 at somewhere called “The Venue”, trainspotters). That night, the setlist looked liked this:

Procession, Ceremony, 586, Truth, We All Stand, Hurt, Everything's Gone Green, Age Of Consent, Ultraviolence. Only one of these songs made it to the setlist in 2006…

Strange tour really this. There’s no new product to promote, but it’s being promoted as the “Singles Collection Tour”, yet they’re not playing many of the singles, and they’re performing at least half of the tracks from their 2005 album, which they didn’t bother to promote with a tour at the time. Very New Order.

Due to not leaving the house until after eight, and pre-gig drinkies in Gillespies, we missed the support Section 25, old mates of the band from the Factory days, but as they’ve been playing the Fylde recently no doubt the chance to see them will occur again at some point. It was a surprise to see the Ballroom rammed full – it wasn’t this busy for Radiohead earlier in the year. So at 9.05, New Order came on stage and slammed straight into new fave "Crystal", followed by crowd pleasers “Regret” & “Ceremony”, with singalongs a plenty. The legendary Empress acoustics didn’t do the band any favours really, making much of Barney’s between song banter inaudible, though he did apologise for his voice as he had tonsillitis – sounded okay to me.

The set was a good mixture of tracks from “Waiting For The Sirens’ Call”, NO regulars like “Bizarre Love Triangle” and Joy Division songs such as the rarely played “24 Hours” and “These Days”. Not much different from what they’ve been playing for the last few years, but a fine selection all the same. The set got into top gear with a tremendous version of “Temptation” which saw Celia & I grooving away like it was our own personal indie-disco. “The Perfect Kiss” has been a much-missed song from their setlists over the last few years, and it was good to see that they’d re-introduced it, complete with a perfect segue into the inevitable “Blue Monday”, complete with Barney‘s bad dancing.

Due to the call of nature and a trip to the bar, I missed the first song of the encore “Turn”, (which is no bad thing) but made it back for the JD classics “Shadowplay” and their increasingly pubrockish version of “Love Will Tear Us Apart” (“Come on!!”).

And that was it. They were gone. Probably as good as they’ve ever been, over those 90 minutes New Order proved that they still had what it takes to make Blackpool rock.

Setlist: Crystal, Regret, Who's Joe, Ceremony, Waiting For The Sirens' Call, These Days, Twenty Four Hours, Krafty, Your Silent Face, Guilt Is A Useless Emotion, Bizarre Love Triangle, Temptation, The Perfect Kiss, Blue Monday, Turn, Shadowplay, Love Will Tear Us Apart

True Faith

Out of the myriad of bands that I’ve followed, New Order are probably my favourite. It’s been a love affair with them since 1983, when I first heard “Confusion” on the Top 40 rundown. I thought it sounded a bit like Freeze’s “IOU” (not surprising as they were both produced by Arthur Baker), but it sounded great. I didn’t really know then that New Order were formed from the ashes of Joy Division, though I had heard “Love Will Tear Us Apart” previously and knew that Tony Wilson bloke off Granada’s “What’s On” had something to do with them and it. When “Blue Monday” went back into the charts for the second time that year, I was knocked out. This was a weird and wonderful record.

Our paths crossed for the next three years, as I caught the odd single release here and there on evening Radio 1, read about them in Smash Hits and saw their appalling TOTP performances, but like many, it wasn’t until “Substance” and the seminal “True Faith” that you could say I became a fan. After that I became more and more obsessed about the band, and as I started work and came into money around the “Technique” era so was able to snap up their releases ASAP as opposed to playing catch up around second hand shops. I loved the fact that each release seemed like something to cherish, lovingly packaged in a sleeve with the superb design work of Peter Saville.

Of course, as with most bands, the releases started coming out less frequently, and frustratingly only 1990’s “World In Motion” England song would fill the gap for the next three years. There were spin off projects to buy (Sumner & ex-Smith Johnny Marr’s excellent Electronic, Steve & Gillian’s so-so Other Two and Hooky’s downright piss-poor Revenge) as each member wanted to do their own thing. But the burning question was: would the four of them ever make a record again as New Order? Would I ever get to see them live? And would things be the same since Factory had gone kaput?

No need to worry. 1993 saw the release of their first single on major label London Records, the classic single “Regret” and the accompanying album “Republic”, a much more commercial product than anything that had ever gone before, but it was still recognizably New Order. What was even better, there would be a chance of seeing them live at last, albeit at a festival. So it was on August Bank Holiday I made the trek down south to Reading to see their only UK live appearance that year, and wasn’t disappointed, with a superb set of classics, current faves and shit dancing from Mr Sumner. Some said that they were always awful live, but if this had been the case previously, it was no longer true – on that August Sunday night, they were blinding.

I wasn’t to know then it would be five long years before our paths crossed again. Increasingly fractious relationships during the long US leg of the tour and the fall out from the Factory Records debacle had taken their toll, and although they hadn’t officially split, it became apparent that there would be no further New Order releases for the foreseeable future.

So at least I’d seen their last ever gig. I still bought the offshoot bands’ releases, but like methadone to a heroin addict, it’s not the same. I saw Peter Hook’s band Monaco a few times, which was probably the nearest thing I was going to get to New Order. Good, but it’s not the real thing (although their gig at Manchester University in 1997 when Tim Burgess of The Charlatans got on stage to sing NO’s “Lonesome Tonight” is a moment to cherish). Of course there were loads of New Order re-releases and remixes as the record label were determined to cash in on the band whilst they could (“Blue Monday 1995” anybody?), but it didn’t make up for the band not being around.

Surprisingly in 1998, out of the blue the Manchester Evening News announced there was going to be a gig at the Manchester Apollo, as a warm up to an appearance at the Reading festival. The band? New Order. There was no way I was going to miss this. Seemingly the band had decided that there was no good reason not to get back together, and would give a reunion a try. And the gig was a classic, with the band seemingly revitalised, Hooky & Barney getting on, and a few Joy Division classics thrown in. They were back. It wasn’t a one off, as I saw them again at Xmas, with a promise of more to come.

Spin on to 2001 and the first new album in 8 years, “Get Ready” which was a move away from the polished pop dance stuff they’d been increasingly known for since “Technique”, and to a more raw guitar based sound, heard to best effect on the opening single “Crystal”. And as 21 years had passed since Ian Curtis’s demise, they’d become more comfortable with Joy Division’s legacy. So increasingly JD songs littered their sets, to the point where many a fan has been known to complain that they were doing too many JD songs. Fair comment. On the three occasions I’ve seen them since 2001 only about 3/4 of the set is NO material. But look at it from their point of view: they’d written the bleedin’ songs, why couldn’t they play them again? (Even if they do murder “Love Will Tear Us Apart” every time).

They’ve recently started to receive more and more “lifetime achievement” awards. It’s always a worry when this starts to happen, as it seems that the hunger seems to go, especially when the ”establishment” accepts you. The band I fell in love with were always the outsiders, doing things their way. But, I suppose not playing the game doesn’t feed the kids, and it’s probably time they got their due credit from the industry, as well as getting paid at last. After twenty odd years, letting “Blue Monday” be used in adverts for Mars bars is fair enough especially bearing in mind they never made any money on that record in the first place, due to Factory’s shady business practice.

Maybe their most recent output isn’t as good as the old stuff. Maybe the gigs aren’t as special as they once were. Maybe Gillian’s absence is a bad thing, and it’s become a bit Dad-rock. Maybe they’re getting old and fat. All I know is that it’s great to have New Order still around, and having once thought I’d lost them for good, I’m going to make sure that every time there’s a tour I’m going to be there.

Which brings me to tonight… New Order @ Blackpool Empress Ballroom.

Review to follow.

Essential purchases: “Singles” (2005) / “Brotherhood” (1986) / “Technique” (1989) / “Get Ready” (2001)

"My Day Out In The Big Car" by Richard Hammond

I went to yorkshur to drive the big car that goez fast coz Jeremy and the other wun alwez make fun ov me and sed I was rubbish driver so I wantid to sho vem so I got in the big car and went ded fast and made them boff look crap but car went wonky and crashed and I went in ambullanse to hostipal coz I had bad hed but better now and warking bout a bit and got lotz of flowerz and will bee bak on telly soon I hop with top geer dogg.

Jeremy and other wun still say I am a rubbish driver. Vey smell ov poo.

Richard (age fivv and a harf)